Q Hi Auntie, my world has been shattered into a million tiny pieces. I just found out that my husband has been sexting for YEARS!
Wait for it Auntie, because it gets worse… the person he is talking dirty with is his cousin.
Is this normal?
I am completely and utterly devastated, heartbroken, and disgusted all at once. It’s not bad enough that he’s been unfaithful, but with his own cousin? No man, I am sommer naar.
I feel completely trapped and alone in this awful situation. I’m a complete and total wreck! What can I do?
A Jirre girl, Auntie can hear the agony in your heart all the way through your email. This is just one of the worst things that could happen to anyone.
Shame meisie. You have every right to be completely and utterly devastated by this revelation. It’s a betrayal of the highest order, and the fact that it’s with his own cousin just makes it so much worse. Sies!
Auntie can’t even begin to imagine how you’re feeling right now – heartbroken, disgusted, violated, and so much more, I’m sure.
But please know that you are not alone. You deserve all the love and support in the world right now.
So don’t be afraid to reach out to someone you trust: a friend, a family member, your spiritual leader, maybe even a therapist.
You took the first step by coming to Auntie, now you need constant support from someone close to you. Let them know what you’re going through, because you don’t have to carry this burden by yourself.
Now the question is what to do about your hubby? Of course you are going to have to confront him.
The bottom line is that he is cheating on you, no matter who is on the receiving end his dirty messages.
And if he is so vieslik as to do it with a family member, who says he is not phone jolling with anyone else?
While sexting might never lead to cheating physically, dit maak nie saak nie, because there’s no room for jolling of any form in a marriage or any relationship.
If this happened to Auntie, she would have told that man to voetsek. But you need to decide for yourself if it will even be possible to forgive him or trust him again (that’s now if he comes clean and decides to stop this nastiness).
And yes, it’s true that it will be hard to face his family right now, but that’s something you can figure out later. Right now, the most important thing is to focus on yourself and your own well-being. You can get through this, even though it might not feel like it right now.