Q Dear Auntie Pearl, I feel so bad because I am struggling with high sugar levels.
The thing is I have had it for many years, and now it’s dangerously high and the doctors are saying it is life-threatening.
Now on top of everything my son has told me he is gay, and I really do not mind. But the thing is he wants me to be there for him and help him with things that he is struggling with.
I am so worried about myself that I can’t even worry about him now.
I am so tired the whole time, and have very short breath and a bad heart.
What do I do? My husband is not a talking man and doesn’t want to talk to our son.
How can I help my son if I can’t even help myself? My son is 17 years old.
A Hayibo my dearest Mirriam, what a story you have for Auntie today.
I feel for you, really, this is a really tough time for you, and your family.
Firstly, hats off to you Mirriam for not “minding” that your son is gay.
You clearly have a lovely son who you have a beautiful relationship with, and the only thing is he needs you now and you feel like you can not be there for him.
You have basically been dealt a double blow nuh – your son has announced he’s gay while the doctor has announced your blood sugar is getting worse.
I can hear you want to be there for your boy, but physically and mentally you are unable to due to your sugar sickness.
Sit your son down and explain to him how bad your sickness is, if you haven’t already.
He is 17 and old enough to know what’s going on, and that might also help your relationship.
Also, your hubby needs to step up here, sweetie pie. He has a sick wife and a son in need of support, guidance and acceptance.
He needs to show he’s a man of love, patience, understanding and worth by supporting both of you.
Auntie thinks it would really help if you guys got some support from mense who are able to understand the very complex and unique situation you find yourself in now.
Famsa’s head office is at 9 Bowden Road, Observatory and you can phone 021 447 7951 or 082 231 0373 for an appointment or to ask about their other offices which might be closer to you.
Getting some support for yourself, so that you can be there for your son, is also a good idea; try Diabetes SA on 086 111 3913 or 021 425 4440.
It’s heartbreaking to hear your dilemma, but you are the parent in this situation, so you need to pick yourself up, put your big girl panties on and focus on your son, and not wallow in your own problems so much.
Diabetes can be managed with the proper diet and medication, so don’t despair, just get the right information to assist you.
As for your son, this could be make or break time for him. He needs to know that you accept him and love him, so please don’t neglect him now.