Q Dear Auntie Pearl, a few weeks ago I did something stupid.
My boyfriend and I had a little too much to drink and we were fooling around.
As you can imagine, we ended up in bed. Don’t worry, we used protection.
The thing is that we thought it would be sexy to take some naughty pictures.
It was actually fun and I felt kwaai like a supermodel, but that might just have been the booze because the next morning I was not so sure about it.
I asked him to delete the pictures, but he refused.
He teased me that he can now totally control me because he has nude pictures of me.
He even said he can put them on Facebook.
Auntie, I know he was joking and won’t do it, but I can’t help feeling very nervous about this.
When I ask him to delete the pictures, he just laughs and makes as if it is all a joke.
What can I do?
From Jenny B
A Ooh jinne Jenny, it makes Auntie very nervous when she hears things like this.
I don’t know your berk, so it’s difficult to say which way his true intentions lie.
You see, some people actually do communicate in a teasing way.
It’s a way for them to connect emotionally.
They smaak it when they get a reaction from others.
Of course, how a person reacts to this is also different.
Some people can just take it, others sommer get all opgewerk.
What bothers Auntie in this situation is that he is not just teasing you in a sweet way, he actually has a hold over you, and it seems like he is enjoying being the one in power.
Blikskottel, this social media business really scares Auntie sometimes.
All your boyfriend has to do is press a few buttons and your kaal pics are all over for anyone to see.
Of course, he could end up in big trouble, and possibly jail, if he did so without your consent, but the pictures will still be out there!
Listen, honey, it sounds to Auntie like your outjie might just be playing around, and you just need to get him to delete those pictures.
The best thing to do when he teases you is just to ignore it.
Don’t take the bait.
Just keep calm and tune him in a serious manner that you do not think he is funny, and that if he doesn’t delete the pictures, it’s over.
The other option is more serious.
Call him out in front of your friends.
When in a group situation, tell your pals that you two fooled around and took some nude pics, and then also tell everyone that he now refuses to delete them.
They would be shocked at this, and he’ll probably feel like c**p when they diss him for being such an ass.
You could also return the favour - take some nudes of him and then give him some of his own medicine.
Your last option is to simply jep his phone and delete them yourself. Whatever you decide, it’s time to take a closer look at your boyfriend and decide whether he is a good guy or not.
Do you really want to be with someone who abuses his “power” and wants to control you?