Q Hi Auntie Pearl. I’m 23 years old and have been with my berk for almost two years now. We’re so good together and everything is great.
This is my first real relationship, so I’m still learning the ropes.
We are very open with each other and we don’t lie or keep secrets. But now something has happened and I don’t know how to handle it.
A couple of nights ago I had an erotic dream about one of our mutual friends.
Auntie, I can tell you the dream was really hot and heavy, and the friend was doing things to me that really got me going.
Now I feel like I cheated on my boyfriend!
I know this shouldn’t be a big deal, because dreams are just dreams and crazy things can happen in them and I don’t think it means anything.
The friend I dreamed about is pretty hot, but I’m not interested in him really, and I won’t leave my boyfriend.
Still, I feel like I should talk about it because it’s so weird. My berk can be a bit insecure at times – his previous meisie cheated on him.
Can I just keep quiet? It feels like I did something wrong and now I’m hiding it.
From Dreamgirl
A Ja meisie, it’s just like you say: Dreams are strange things. Who knows why you had these warme gedagtes about that friend of yours.
It’s pretty clear to Auntie that you really smaak your boyfriend and I doubt you have some underlying urge to actually hook up with someone else.
The fact that you are feeling uncomfortable about something that just happened in your dreams says a lot. You sound like a good and honest person.
But listen, there’s no real reason to feel bad about not telling your berk about this.
If you don’t want to and think it’s just going to hurt his feelings and cause trouble, let it go.
It was just a dream!
If you can honestly say you have no real desire to get bymekaar with that other guy, and if you don’t go jolling around, then everything is kwaai.
Should you feel that you absolutely must talk about it, just be careful.
Don’t just tell your boyfriend out of nowhere that you had a sex dream about one of his friends. Most likely he will not take it well, and even be jealous.
Ease into the conversation. Maybe start by having a general conversation about dreams. Ask him what he dreams about, and try to find out if he places a lot of meaning in them.
Even though you feel guilty right now, it’s not necessary – you’re not actually keeping anything important from your boyfriend.