Q Hi Auntie, my berk is being a jerk all the time when we go out and I don’t think I can take it anymore.
On the other hand, he’s totally awesome when we are alone. I’m 21 and he is 22.
So here’s the deal: When we go out together, he doesn’t give me any attention.
He’s always chatting with other people, even buying them drinks, having a laugh and shooting pool or playing foosball.
I’m left having to hang out with whoever else is there, and entertaining myself all night.
My berk never even buys me a drink when we are out with other people, he just has a jol on his own.
But then when we are alone, he’s all sweet. We go on dates just the two of us, and he goes all out and pays for dinner and alles.
Auntie, how do I get him to be the best boyfriend when we are with other people as well?
From Jerusha
A Jinne Jerusha, you sound like the definition of a high-maintenance girlfriend.
Do you want your poor berk to forget all about the rest of the world and only give you attention?
You’re going to drive him away faster than Lewis Hamilton gets out of the blocks.
Now Auntie is not saying it is okay for him to ignore you when you go out. But girl, you have got to let him have some fun!
Here’s a question for you: Does your berk even know you are upset about the way he behaves when you are out with other people? Have you told him?
If you have discussed this with him – and Auntie means having a civilised conversation, not you dissing him – and he still is behaving like a poephol, then maybe it’s time to start thinking about getting another boyfriend.
Being all sweet at home and on dates – paying for alles, lucky girl – does not make up for his public behaviour.
But if he doesn’t know how you feel, you need to let him know.
Maybe he is just a social person who likes spending time with his pals.
Maybe he thinks he gives you all the attention all the time when you are alone, and he just wants to let loose a little.
Tell him you don’t expect him to cling to you like a mossel in public, but that you at least want some acknowledgment as his girlfriend when you are out with other people.