Romance fraud is real – and women should guard against it!
We are heading into February, also known as the month of love, with Valentine’s Day falling on the 14th day.
While many lucky ladies will be getting chocolates, flowers and romance – others will be getting nothing but heartbreak and empty bank accounts.
This is because online romance fraud has skyrocketed since Covid-19 and lockdowns hit.
Individuals, mostly women, have been getting lonelier and more desperate for friendship and companionship in recent times.
Subsequently, many have been scammed out of their life’s savings by “soulmates” they have never even met!
Did you know that romance fraud is one of the biggest money-making scams in the world?
This type of fraud cuts deep, not only financially but emotionally as well.
Often, the humiliation and betrayal are far worse for the victim than the loss of money.
That is why so few incidents of this type of scam are reported to the police, essentially allowing these conmen to keep at it.
These romance scams start with fraudsters using fake online identities to gain a victim’s attention, affection and trust.
They normally use good-looking profile pics stolen off the internet, and often pose as widowers or divorcees.
But in all likelihood, they are actually professional skelms who are part of online syndicates situated in Nigeria or other parts of the world.
Many will pretend to work in the military service or on oil rigs.
Before Covid-19, this served as a perfect cover for not being able to travel and meet the women that they con.
Alas, Covid-19 and its travel restrictions made it so much easier for these fraudsters.
These criminals are clever and work with a plan to gain access to your personal details and bank accounts.
On Facebook especially, they will make themselves known by sending a friend request, or just by liking your posts.
Then it will move on to commenting here and there – and then onto communicating via Messenger.
Once they gain their victims’ trust, they will move onto emails, phone calls and sharing pics.
I once heard a victim of one of these conmen say: “I felt a real soul connection with him right away. We sang to each other. We prayed with each other.
“He liked what I liked.”
Make no mistake – these guys are experts at what they do!
So whilst a woman may feel special and think they are the only love interest, these criminals often have some sort of scam going with up to a dozen women at a time!
Through careful manipulation, these con artists gain access to the hearts and bank accounts of lonely, vulnerable women.
Tips for avoiding romance scams:
1. Be careful of what you post and make public online.
Scammers can use details shared on social media and dating sites to better understand and target you.
If you post pics online of you being an avid runner, don’t be surprised when someone who also supposedly loves running makes contact with you.
Research the person’s photo and profile using online searches to see if the image, name or details have been used elsewhere.
Don’t think of this as stalking or being insecure.
Think of it as due diligence in these crazy times.
If someone showed interest in you in person, chances are you would ask friends and family what they knew about them.
So there is no reason to not do the same online.
2. Go slowly and ask lots of questions, you have nothing to lose.
Don’t just accept information given by a stranger at face value.
Ask for proof.
Beware
3. Beware if someone seems too perfect or is too quick in asking you to leave a dating or social media site, so that they can communicate directly with you.
Often, after a short time, they will tell you that they have never felt like this before and that your connection was “meant to be”.
4. Don’t be drawn into sexting.
Watch out if they ask for sexy photos of you, or get you to send racy messages.
You might find this exciting, but conmen will often use these pics and messages to blackmail you later.
5. Watch out for things that simply “don’t fit”.
For example, if he claims to be university educated, but can’t spell properly, or he says he is from a city, country or job industry, which he knows nothing about, etc.
6. Beware of the excuses.
Be careful of individuals who promise to meet in person but then always cancel or come up with an excuse why they can’t.
Harden your heart against their sob stories.
This may include needing money for sick family members, to get a project done or for travelling to visit you.
7. And this goes without saying – never, ever send them cash.
Never send money, IDs, bank cards details or bank details to anyone you have only communicated with online or by phone.
If you do this, you have no reason to be surprised when you are platsak within no time!
Though women are primarily the victims of romance fraud, it happens to men too.
Anyone who is lonely, vulnerable and just looking for companionship can become a target.
Watch out for the red flags and trust your instincts.
When in doubt, speak to a trusted family member or friend, who can see a clearer picture from the outside.
If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
Rather be lonely and safe, than poor and sorry!