Q Dear Auntie Pearl, I am 16 years old and I have a boyfriend.
I am in love with him and everything was so kwaai but now I don’t know anymore because my best friend told me she saw him kissing another girl.
Now my berk says she’s lying and he promises he didn’t do it but I don’t know what to do and who to believe.
This other girl is a year older than us and she has a bad rep in our neighbourhood, Auntie. She apparently sleeps with men and I’ve heard my ma say she is ougat and that she thinks it is funny to get bymekaar with other girls’ boyfriends because she thinks she’s sexy.
I don’t know her, so I don’t know.
What must I do and who do I believe?
A Ai jinne shame meisie, Auntie can understand that you feel confused.
Don’t stress, take a deep breath and let’s talk this through.
Now you might be young and only 16 years old, but you sound to Auntie like a smart little lady with a good head on her shoulders.
Some quick advice, poplap, don’t always believe what other mense tell you.
This includes your friend piemping your berk vrying another meisie, and your mammie saying this girl’s ougat and the community painting this girl as a slut.
Rather think for yourself, and listen with your own ears, and see with your own eyes.
Now it sounds to Auntie like you are not having sex with your berk – well done meisie!
Keep it that way!
You kinners of today are so quick to do adult dinge, and then you have to sit with the gebakte pere.
Let Auntie tell you, having a baby at 16 or 17 is no fun at all, but that’s a conversation for another day.
You stay strong and don’t let him, or anyone else, pop your cherry until you are grown up and can deal with the consequences, whatever they may be, good or bad.
Also well done for keeping calm and not causing a scene by accusing this girl of allerhande dinge in public.
It’s always better to take a step back at times like this, and not act out on raging emotions.
Even if all you want to do is moer someone and scream!
That just causes more trouble and more pain and then we say and do things that we regret later on.
Now look here, Confused, are you sure your bestie is not just trying to start a rumour?
Between your berk and your friend, who is more likely to lie to you, and why?
You know them better than Auntie, so trust your gut feeling.
If you feel your berk is lying and did kiss this girl, tell him to gooi ‘n lange.
Then tune him straight you don’t date cheaters and tell him voetsek.
Your bestie might just have your best interests at heart, so don’t sommer discard her warnings about this guy.
As for this other meisie who everyone says is bad news – don’t judge a book by its cover.
How would you feel if people started spreading rumours about you?