Q
Dear Auntie Pearl, I am very worried about a friend of mine.
We are just 17 years old and still in school, but she has been drinking a lot.
It’s not just a skelm beer or two, she gets gesuip so badly she can barely stand on her feet.
I think it’s this new crowd of girls she has been hanging out with.
They are totally wild and go partying in the city or anywhere they can get smashed.
I know my friend is not this type of girl, she’s smart and has a bright future, and I worry that she is throwing it all down the drain.
I’ve tried to talk to her, and now she barely wants to hang out with me anymore.
She is always making excuses not to see me and cancels our plans at the last minute.
Out of desperation, I have also spoken to other friends about this.
I don’t like to skinner, but I am just so worried. Everyone agrees that she is in trouble.
What am I supposed to do?
If she was still going out with me, I could keep an eye on her, but when she is with that other group of girls, there’s nothing I can do.
Should I speak to her parents? I know she does not get along with them.
From W.
A
Shame, meisie, you seem really worried about this friend of yours who is making such terrible choices in her life.
Auntie has to say I am very proud of you – for being such a good friend, and for not also falling in with that other crowd of party girls.
Now Auntie obviously doesn’t know the whole situation, but from what you are saying about your friend and her parents, this sends up red flags for Auntie.
When teenagers are not in a loving environment, it’s very common for them to act out.
Unfortunately, this often results in alcohol abuse or, even worse, drugs.
Maybe it would be a good idea to ask your friend about how things are going at home and if she would like to talk about that, rather than calling her a dronklap.
She needs to trust you and see that you have her best intentions at heart, so that she can confide in you.
If this doesn’t work, you will have to get your other good friends to help you.
You can all get together and tell her that you are worried about her and her behaviour.
Make it clear that you are not there to k@k her out, but that you want to support her.
Auntie hopes that if she sees she has a group of good friends she can trust and who can support her in these difficult times maybe she won’t have to go out with those other stout kinders to try and drink away the pain.