Q
Dear Auntie Pearl, I need to complain about my boyfriend.
We have been together for almost 10 years, and it has not always been easy.
Not in our relationship, but just this life can be tough.
We did not have a lot of money and it was not easy.
But now my berk has had a run of good fortune.
His dad came into money (I don’t know the details) and gave my boyfriend a moerse klomp cash.
Then the company my man works for became very successful and he got a kwaai raise and is making tons of money.
Of course, I am happy for him and proud of him, but the money has changed him!
Suddenly everything is about image and his looks and sulke superficial things.
He is at a fancy gym where he has a trainer, he’s had bleddie expensive dental work done, and Auntie won’t believe what he pays for a haircut every week!
I feel like a slave, always at home to make sure his new clothes are always shiny, and I sweat in the kitchen all the time to prepare the fancy food he wants.
The women are now throwing themselves at him, and I’m not sure if he is keeping faithful to me.
Auntie knows mos, a man is ‘n fool vir ‘n lekker lyf. Jolling has become alledaags!
I don’t smaak this person he has become.
Do you think it’s just phase? What should I do?
A
Wag ‘n bietjie, so this guy is living like a Hollywood star with his personal trainer and haircuts and getting his bek all beautiful, but you still have to do all the cooking and sort out his clothes?
That doesn’t sound right to Auntie!
The fact that he is rolling in the cash doesn’t mean the relationship has to change.
A real couple treat each other with respect, whether you are poor or rich, deur dik en dun, soos hulle sê.
Auntie worries that you are worried about him maybe cheating on you – are you really concerned, or are you just looking for moeilikheid because he is not the man he used to be?
You need to be very sure of the situation before you go accusing a guy of jolling.
Let me ask you this: does he really treat you badly?
Does he really expect you to do everything for him at home? Did you ask him?
Or have you fallen out of love and now you are only still with him because he provides for you?
It’s time for a reality check, meisie.
If the problem lies with you, you can work on it.
But if he treats you like a doormat, it might be time to move on.