Q
Dear Pearl, I’m not an old school girl and I love technology, but I’m gatvol of my berk always being on his phone.
All day and night it’s just WhatsApp, Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, and all other kinds of random crap.
He looks at the screen all the time, and it’s so bad that I am thinking of dumping him.
We are in our 30s and have been together for four years and living together for the past couple of months.
We get along great, but his phone maniere have gotten out of control.
He is on his device at the table when we eat, he checks it all the time even while we are watching TV, and he is on the thing in bed right up until we go to sleep.
His digital addiction is affecting our sex life!
I’ve mentioned it to him, but he just tunes me I am also on my phone.
Sure, I am of course, but not nearly as much as him!
What should I do?
A
Oh dear, Auntie sees this all the time nowadays.
People really have become addicted to their cellphones.
Kyk maar net na die mense rondom jou– in restaurants couples scroll their phones instead of enjoying their time together and chatting, in the parks mothers ignore their children instead of watching them play, bliksem, people in business meetings even check their phones instead of paying attention to what is discussed.
We are all obsessed with our phones!
Even the other night Auntie was watching a movie with some friends, and at one point I realised we were all on our phones, en die movie heeltemal vergeet.
So although your boyfriend’s behaviour is abnormal, this points to a much bigger problem in society these days.
Either way, he needs to get his nose out of his screen.
Have you told him that you are thinking of leaving him because he gives his phone more attention than you?
But before kicking him out, try to resolve the matter first.
Don’t try and take his phone away from him completely, just change some of your habits, and do it together.
As a start, make a few new house rules, such as no phones at the dinner table or in bed.
Also, when you watch TV together, put the phones in the other room.
Start small and work together to build up better phone habits.
Doing things together and going through things together are what relationships are about.
If he does not want to change his maniere, it’s a bad sign for your relationship.
Compromises have to made when you are bymekaar with someone in a serious relationship.
So if he isn’t willing to change, maybe it will be better for you to dump him.
But it’s a damned sad day when people are splitting up over something as stupid as a phone.
This digital addiction is the worst!