BLOUES: Best to safeguard yourself if you and your berk make sex tapes

Q Dear Auntie Pearl, I’m reading about Malusi Gigaba and his sex tape and how someone tried to blackmail him with R5 million!

Auntie, my boyfriend loves making videos of us having sex, and I let him because he enjoys it, although I don’t really do because I worry what if someone we know sees it or worse, posts it on social media and it goes viral?

They are all on his phone and I can’t delete it because I don’t have his password. 

Anyway, I’m not really worried as long as only he sees it.

How can we safeguard these videos and photos to make sure no one sees them?

I’ve also read about men who post these videos out of anger after a break-up and I don’t want that to happen to me.

Please, Auntie, help! 

From Sleepless in Somerset West.

A Ja, nee, kyk Malusi Gigaba’s “sex video” went viral and now quite a few mense are freaked out, nuh. 

So don’t be a Gigaba and raak wys!  Hayibo, sussa, how about standing up for yourself here? 

If you don’t like being filmed while you do the nasty − then you tune your berk to stop filming and just do it old school style − without a camera in your face! 

And exactly just how many tapes do you two lovebirds then have? 

Now in all seriousness, it’s time you talk to this guy, decide what you’re going to do with these videos and come up with a plan − and daai plan includes getting copies of those videos to be safe − and that if the blok skroei you also have copies of these homemade blou movies and he doesn’t sit with all the evidence. 

You can also tune your berk not to keep these private videos on his phone − because phones get lost, phones get stolen, accounts get hacked and some mense go mal, especially after a break-up. 

When it comes to things in the digital world, prevention is better than cure soos die mense sê! So tell him it is in both your interests. 

Now you can’t do anything about the videos if they’ve already been made − except to delete them, but it doesn’t sound like that will happen. So talk to your berk about how you feel about this and that although he may think its hot and sexy, how would he feel if other mense look at the two of you pomping? What if your parents or children see it?

Go legal and draw up a written contract to say the videos must be kept safe and not be used as a way to blackmail or make gat of the other person should you break up. 

If he refuses, strips his moer or whatever, you go big or you go home and you go to your local magistrates’ court and get a protection order against that person under the Protection from Harassment Act or Domestic Violence Act and tell them he wants to distribute these videos. 

If someone distributes any content of you without your consent, you can lay a criminal charge of crimen injuria.  

Or just tune him it has been fun, but you skeem he needs to delete those videos − unless he wants to be a Gigaba! 

And tell him you want to write notice or written proof that these videos were in fact deleted. 

If he refuses to provide it to you or are threatening to distribute the videos unless you pay up or give him something then also go to a local magistrate's court and get a protection order against him under the Protection from Harassment Act, or the Protection from Domestic Violence Act, because you were or are in a relationship.