Q
Hello Auntie, I hope you are well.
I’m in a situation. You see, I am Nibbles’ girlfriend.
You know him, he wrote to you a couple of times in the past.
My mother and I have forgiven him for keeping his kids and previous marriage a secret from us.
We love each other and we are working on our relationship.
The problem is my brother; he doesn’t want Nibbles to come to the house.
I have to bring him when my brother is not home.
But I don’t like that I need to sneak him in.
My brother keeps grudges against someone for a long time and doesn’t forgive at all.
What can I do?
From Liefling.
A
Hi there Liefling, Auntie is so glad to hear you and Nibbles managed to handle the entire situation like grootmense.
If only more couples are willing to work so hard on their relationship, instead of just getting into bekgevegte and dropping each other.
Sjoe, and your mammie is also on board with you two. That’s amazing!
As long as there are no more secrets between the two of you, it looks like you are going to have a happy life!
Now, about your brother... Can you really blame him?
Let Auntie tell you something: guys are very protective of their sisters
It’s understandable that your brother is die moer i n for Nibbles.
He probably only sees your berk as a liar who could have messed up your life.
And the truth is, his fears could easily have become a reality!
It’s wonderful that you worked things out, but it’s also a bietjie van ’n wonderwerk!
Liefling, there is nothing you can do to force your broe r to change.
You are just going to have to stick it out, keep calm and hope he will come around in the future.
Do not pressure him!
You have to give him time to deal with what Nibbles did, and Nibbles will have to prove that he can be trusted.
And if that means you cannot bring Nibbles to the house for a few months, then so be it.
I know you say your brother does not forgive at all, but you might be surprised.
He is protective of you as his sister because he loves you, and it’s because of this that he will also want to see you live happily ever after.
And if Nibbles is the one who makes you happy and is always going to be there, then he will come to realise it.
Don’t keep Nibbles’ visits a secret from your brother.
Tell him you two are going to be together forever, and you are going to bring him to the house, but that you respect your brother and will not do it while he is there.
No more of this sneaking around – you have just put your relationship through one gemors with a secret, don’t do it again.