Q
Dear Auntie Pearl, I would like to remain anonymous.
Call me Beauty.
I love my boyfriend very much, but the problem is he wants to marry me as well as another woman.
I’m very confused by this as I’m not sure if this is possible.
We are Christian and I want to know if this allowed in Cape Town, South Africa.
I’m happy to go along with this, but afraid of what people might say and I don’t know if polygamy is legal.
Regards, Beauty.
A
Sjoe, Beauty, what a way to start off a brand new month!
Now listen up girlfriend, this Auntie appreciates that everyone wants to enjoy themselves and do their own thing these days, but is this berk of yours not just taking a big fat chance here, meisie?
Does he not just want his bread buttered on both sides, with two scoops of ice cream in one cone?
Auntie did a bit of reading up and found out that polygamy is actually legal, under certain circumstances, in South Africa.
According to the Recognition of Customary Marriages Act 120 of 1998, polygamous marriages are recognised under South African law, meaning it is legal.
Remember former president Jacob Zuma? He had more than one wife at the same time.
However, polygamous marriages are not allowed under the Marriage Act and the Civil Unions Act.
Now if your berk wants more than one wife, he will have to register it as a customary marriage. Failing to do so will render the first marriage invalid.
Auntie sees that you are happy to go along with a polygamous marriage, but have you considered everything about it, Beauty?
You will be two women, with their children, vying for the attention, love and money of one man.
Will he be able to treat you both equally and the same?
Auntie suggests you set down some ground rules before entering into this union.
Mense sal altyd praat, Beauty, so laat hulle maar hulle bekke rek.
If this is what you want to do, do it. It’s as simple as that.