The matric class of 2020 finally got their results last week.
And as could be expected, social media was abuzz with proud parents showing off the kids’ excellent results.
There is, of course, nothing wrong with bragging about the brilliant results that will probably guarantee university entry for your child and help them carve out a bright future for themselves.
These kids worked very hard in a year that tested all of us to the extreme, so that makes their results even more worthy of celebration.
But every time I saw another post by a beaming parent singing their child’s praises, I wondered about those parents who didn’t post anything, because their child didn’t do as well.
I thought about them and how all the excitement must be getting them down.
I think we can safely assume that if you did not post a picture of yourself next to your son or daughter, smiling broadly while holding up a certificate, then they probably didn’t do as well; and that's what I want to talk about today – those kids who did poorly, or maybe didn’t make it through at all.
With a few exceptions here and there, you must understand that many of the Facebook celebrations are by kids who had ideal study conditions.
For example, the privilege of being able to concentrate on your studies in a private bedroom, in a lovely quiet house in the suburbs, can make passing matric a whole lot easier.
It’s definitely not the sole criteria for academic excellence, but it does help.
It certainly doesn’t erode natural aptitude the same way that living in poverty does.
There’s a whole lot of truth in the phrase: “You can’t teach a hungry child.”
And that is the skewered reality that we witness on Facebook.
We see the results of a privileged life that makes hard work a little easier.
I am not throwing shade on those who live well and give their kids the best.
But I do want them to appreciate that the majority of kids do not have the ideal home conditions that allow them to excel.
And those kids from those homes need to give themselves a little slack for their circumstances. Don’t be hard on yourself.
It's OK that your hard work didn't pay off right now.
But don’t let it define you and your goals; there are numerous ways in which to measure success, and failure doesn’t have to mean the end of your dreams.
If anything, it should crystalise them further and light a fire of determination in your belly.
If for whatever reason you didn’t do as well as you had hoped, let it motivate and inspire you. Success is not a destination.
It is a journey in which there will be many more setbacks and challenges.
The trick is to keep your eye on the prize and to keep moving forward, even if it is one tiny little step at a time.
Identify your passions and clarify what success means to you, and stay focussed on that.
I have always believed that passion is worth a whole lot more than skill, which is something you can learn along the way.
If you’re passionate about something, and have the endurance and relentless drive to pursue it, then success and happiness are inevitable.
And when you get there, then believe me, your matric results won’t matter so much anymore.
subhead 36: Didn’t pass matric? Don’t worry, it’s just a setback
Caption: EXCITED: Clyde Smythe from Bernadino Heights in Scottsville
Caption: CHIN UP: Success is not a destination but a journey with many setbacks