Q Hi Auntie Pearl, I totally love your advice.
I met this guy years ago, and we have been friends all along and weren’t interested in each other at all.
I was in a relationship for a year, and he was single. I started to see him as more than a friend, and I then told him to leave me alone.
I ended up single and now this guy is in a relationship, and it seems the reverse of our previous situation is about to go on.
I am not sure what to make of all this.
I still see him and he does not really mention his girlfriend, even though I know she exists. He is taken, and not mine... yet I feel that I own him.
I know the saying “mens krap nie in ’n ander persoon se slaai nie”, but what about destiny?
I am not sure what to do! I mean, we always work or manage to find our way back to each other without knowing.
I just want clarity. Thanks in advance!
A Shame my dear, here you are sitting all alone, while destiny seems to be keeping the man of your dreams out of your reach.
It really does sound to Auntie like you two should be together.
You said it yourself – you were friends, but it has become more than that. It is clear you have feelings for each other.
Maar wees versigtig, you are right, you don’t want to “krap in iemand anders se slaai”.
Auntie respects your decision to stay away from him, that is very mature of you.
If you two start a relationship while one of you is cheating, the whole thing is doomed to go down the toilet some day, trust me.
So Auntie’s advice is this: Don’t interfere with his relationship. If you two really are destined to be together, it will happen naturally.
As hard as it might seem, you have to give this guy’s relationship with that girl a chance. Maybe they are the ones destined to be together. If not, then one day you and this dream man will both be single, and you will get together and start a happy life.
Auntie suggests you give this outjie some space. Avoid seeing him too often, and definitely avoid seeing him in romantic settings. So no candle-lit dinners (not even “just as friends”), and no snuggling under the blankets watching romantic movies!
Auntie knows this is breaking your heart, but if you should one day in the future be with this guy, you will look back and thank me for keeping you from ruining something beautiful.
Good luck, C. Auntie hopes destiny will smile upon you and bring the right man into your life.